Never has a word ever granted me such peace. Allow me to rephrase that- never has the meaning, timing and significance of a word impacted me so directly and intensely.
The teaching at 7:30PM onThursday, May 21st was the Universe aligning with me, leading my way through a sea of hurt, confusion, conflict, contradiction.
How would you define compassion? Pause and think about what this word means to you.
Compassion is a father wishing with all of his strength to have his daughter’s late stage Cancer so she does no longer have to suffer. Compassion is wishing to take his daughter’s suffering away, even if it means he would have to feel it himself.
Compassion is understanding suffering, really understanding it- from the bottom of your being. From your core, from your soul.
Compassion is not a rich man giving a poor man a Ferrari. The rich man wants to help, but has not taken the time to understand the extent of the poor man’s suffering to see that what they need is not a luxury car, but food, shelter, maybe even love instead. The rich man is thinking about what he would want if he were sad, and applying it as everyone’s desire.
Compassion takes willingness to grasp the depths of others’ suffering.
That idleThursday, the first meditation consisted on recognizing a sort of cloud of smoke in our chest- which symbolizes hurt, anxiety, confusion, any bad feelings or states of mind. Recognizing it, identifying it and visualizing it. After I am done explaining the meditation, I encourage you to do it as well. Close your eyes and focus on the world around you disappearing, and you are surrounded by a white, infinite space full of light.
Breathe in deep. Exhale with strength.
Each breath in is clear, white light, and each breath out takes along with it a little bit of that dark smoke. Breathe in light to replace that pain, that hurt, that smoke. Focus on breathing and focus on cleansing.
Imagine that light throughout your entire body, and that smoke leaving your heart with each breath.
Now envision someone that has hurt you deeply. That person might hurt others, that person might hurt themselves, that person might not know another way to live. But that person, just like all of us, has all the seeds necessary for compassion, for love, for forgiveness, for peace. We all have the tools necessary, but only some of us plant them and grow them, some of us do not understand them.
I think this adds so much beauty to life- these tools, these seeds… they are there for us, and throughout our journey we discover these different seeds within us that might have seem so foreign the week before. And we nurture them. And we water them, and they plant growth within us. They grow and become intricate, intimate designs of what we have created to be who we are. They feel like different colors, like different shades and shapes, and they slowly construct us.
But enough about seeds.
Focus on this person, and think of their cloud… envision the suffering and hurt that has brought them to this point. We all have our pasts- but in this moment, think of that person’s pain.
Now think of the position of your heart in your breathing body. Imagine it being this beautiful crystal full of all the light you just received. Now envision a shell around it, almost like hard, dry charcoal. This symbolizes your ego, your self cherishing.
This person is still in front of you. Feel their past, imagine the agony. And breathe their pain in, their smoke. Be the father with the terminally ill daughter.
The moment you breathe in this smoke, it will touch the charcoal shell. The moment they touch, a part of that shell is broken off. They eventually cancel each other out. Absolute Zero. Your selflessness in truly wanting that person free of that suffering is the only way to truly heal, as a world. What if we all did that for each other?
Imagine that person filled with joy, and the weight that they have been carrying all along has been finally lifted- because you liberated them through compassion.
How beautiful is that? How does that not draw a smile on your face..
I entered the temple confused, angry, hurt, deceived, and craving some sort of healing. What I thought would take months- the stages that I would have to go through to help me understand- took the right words, love and intention at the exact time I would absorb every color of their meaning in the matter on one hour and a half.
I hope this will do the same for you- and do not confuse a Ferrari with compassion (that would have made no sense at the beginning of this entry!).